One of the main reasons I am looking for a new job is that I am surrounded by people who pass the buck and finger point. I am completely disinterested in whose fault a mistake is. I am the person who will say, "What do we need to do to fix this? If _______ is constantly making this same mistake do they need coaching, or do we just need to find someone else to do this?"
I like myself. Therefore, I do not need to point out the faults in others. I just need to find out what is wrong and try and figure out how a solution can be sought and obtained. I have conversations almost every day with people who say things like, "Well, I wasn't trained on that and I picked it up" when I say someone needs better coaching and training.
I can honestly say I'm sick and tired of people who talk down about how others can't perform a certain task. Everyone has different strengths. While I can solve a really difficult math problem in minutes, I couldn't tell you why my computer is running so slow. I can spell words that most people can't even pronounce, but I can't draw a picture of a cat that doesn't look like a dinosaur. People need to realize that it's okay for people not to be as strong as they are in certain areas. I can swing around a 20 lb. kettlebell for an hour like it's made of air. I'm not going to wander around with my kettlebell testing people and yelling, "Oh, you can't do exercises with that? LOSER!" That's what most people do on a daily basis when they don't respect that other people learn differently than they do.
We need to recognize and focus on the positive. I realize this is difficult because some people have so little positive you'd have to pull them apart and dig through their bones to find it. I choose to just not involve myself in interactions with those folks. If I can't recognize and value a strength in you, I'd prefer to just spend my time with other people. If someone is having a hard time with a task, work with them to show them how to do that task. If it's something they just can't grasp, time to find someone else to train to do that. Stop making it harder than it is or constantly blaming by saying, "They aren't taking initiative." Or, "I don't think they're going to be able to do that." To me, you should be saying, "I have failed in training them correctly. Can I fix that, or do I need to tell them we have to find someone else to do this?"
Dave and I had our first fight the other night and it's because he always complains about one certain thing. I offered a solution to it and he declined. So I said, "You're not allowed to complain about that then. I tried to fix it and you didn't accept. Complaining over." I have a really hard time with people who offer lip service but don't back it up with action. If you say you feel a certain way, or you are sorry for a certain thing, you better damn well show me that your words hold their weight. Otherwise I have no time for you.
I know I talk a strong game about the way I live and the things I do, and it's only because I back that up with how I live my daily life and interact with others. There are so many people, even the ones I love, who I notice don't do this. Life is only as hard as you make it. Once you are an adult the decisions you make minute to minute are the ones that will dictate whether your life is drama-filled or simple, stressful or joyful, sad or happy. We all have our off days. I'm just trying not to have an off life.
Happy picture of the day: that is a guy walking down the street carrying a ginormous monkey. Now, I get it's state fair time. But it isn't like he got it out of his car to carry to his apartment. He was just strolling down the street at 7:30 in the morning, for BLOCKS carrying this thing.