Fashion

I can dig it. I like to watch Project Runway, and I swear that one day I will own a custom made Chanel suit. What I really dig is when people are wearing what they truly love. What I can't dig is trends, and following them. I sometimes think there are women out there who if they were told, "This month it is fabulous to rub the shit of a small dog on your t-shirts," they would do it. There is nothing more ridiculous to me than seeing a gaggle of girls in black jeans, with scrunchy brown boots, who you know wouldn't be wearing that if they hadn't seen someone "important" do it first. There will never be any excuse for Crocs or Uggs, especially Uggs with a short jean skirt in summer. Now, I have friends who wear Crocs. They're in their 50s, so they get a pass. And I wouldn't tell someone they can't wear something. If you like something, by all means wear it. Just know that if you are wearing something because a magazine told you to, and you don't really "feel" said item, people know what you're doing.

I have never been fashionable, or stylish. I have always been true to myself. In seventh grade true to myself meant wearing a pair of Hammer pants. What? No one else had Hammer pants! Those things were comfy, and hideous. Most of my junior high and high school style was hideous on purpose. The uglier the better. That still ties in to a lot of what I wear today. I like whimsy and kitsch. Let's take a look shall we?

This is my favorite skirt. I saw the print and had to have it. 

I have an admitted addiction to cardigans, and ridiculous sweaters.



I got this at Goodwill in like '90. It was a dollar.

What do you mean you don't have a holiday sweater featuring the lead singer of The Smiths?

I wear shirts that say mean stuff, so I don't have to.



Seriously, put on earbuds. I don't care to hear Nate Dogg coming out of your cell phone.

I have three pairs of high heels. One is called a "zombie stomper" and has green skin and monster teeth all over it. Another pair has a heel made of a brass knuckle. The most normal pair is this pair by Rachel Roy. Pretty!



They're covered in different sized beads, and the heel is made of spikes.

Pretty much all of the dresses I wear are '50s, or '60s inspired. I like actual vintage, but unfortunately it seems that all the chubby women of that era were buried in their dresses, as all I can find is size 4. I'm not opposed to repro wear.



I got this from ModCloth. One of the few things they've carried in my size. It really needs a powder pink petticoat.

I love costume jewelry. The gaudier the better. But I do have a few understated pieces for when I go on nice dinner dates and such. I'm a classy bitch.

I get most of my jewelry at flea markets and Claire's. I love me some cheap jewelry.

I used to have over 100 purses. I realized that was absurd and gifted or sold them off for 10 bucks each. I have about 15 left. I love Kate Spade, but I have found I do not love the attention carrying a name brand handbag garners. I have had two pricey purses in my time, and gave both away. I like cheap and cute now.



The Audrey Hepburn cigar box purse holds next to nothing, but is so cute it's okay. Same with that clutch. I got the clutch at a store in Dallas that catered to strippers. You know, clear bottomed shoes and all. I want to see a stripper on the pole, holding a clutch, dammit!

I could do a weekly blog post about stuff I've seen on people that is adorable. And I spared you my baby blue Huggy Bear pimp coat that will soon be doing a Traveling Pants-like trek around the country, 'cause that'll be its own entry next week some time.

I must admit today at work I am wearing boring stuff. Most of the stuff I wear to the office, I wouldn't be caught dead in after work hours. But who am I kidding? After work hours I'm usually in pajama pants and fuzzy socks watching bad television.

Wear what you love, and make no apologies for it. Even if it's Uggs and a short jean mini in 100 degree weather.