How I Know I'm A Nerd

Because I am more than a little obsessed with puns. Usually after I say something using a pun I will accentuate it by doing a snare drum sound effect with my mouth. This is done badly, but people get the idea. I was going to say I accentuate it by doing a rim shot with my mouth, but somehow that just didn't sound okay.

I sent Sean a text the other day that said, "You are my Seanshine, my only Seanshine, you make me happpeeee when skies are gray. Boo bah boopity doo wah. Yeah!" That was the whole text.

I am selling the Morrissey sweater for half of what I paid for it, because I know my friend's wife LOVES Morrissey and every time she has the money to buy it, it's sold out. If I wasn't a nerd I'd just give it to him. I could use the 40 bucks.

I own a Morrissey sweater.

I have Dr. Seuss Converse.

I watch documentaries religiously. I have seen more documentaries than anyone I know, except my friend Patrick. That guy has a problem. :)

I slap people in the face with my boobs. Why is this nerdy, you ask? Well, I have tiny boobs so slapping people with them requires me almost literally standing on their toes to do so. Sometimes I order them to sit on the bed so that I can, in fact, smack them in the face with my boobs.

I have a honey badger t shirt.

I have Freaks and Geeks magnets on my refrigerator.

I have a magnet of a member of The Monks on my refrigerator.

Let's just go ahead and sum up that I have a super nerdy refrigerator.

My cats have their own couch.

I have two clocks in my house that don't work, and a pinball game. They are still hanging on the wall or sitting there like they work and they confuse people constantly. I find great amusement in this.

I am currently wearing patent leather penny loafers.

I make up song and dance almost constantly. When in New Orleans my friend was having issues with her bowels. I was having no issues and pooping like a champ so every time I came out of the bathroom I sang to the tune Is There A Ghost by Band of Horses, "I can poop. I can poooooo oooooop. When I go to the bathroom, poop comes out of my butt. Of my buh uttttt."

I tease people who can't poop. That's just wrong.

I will remind you here that girls don't actually poop.

I have given in to commenting on blogs from my iPhone since I can't do so on my computer. THAT is nerdly.

Happy picture of the day: don't judge.

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